some quick thoughts before bed

I spend a great deal of my time reminiscing over my childhood. I was so lucky to grow up the way that I did, because I am quite sure that the absence of cable television, computers, and neighbors shaped who I am in a very big way. 

When I was younger, I absolutely hated living in a house in the middle of the woods in the middle of nowhere. I felt like an oddity. There was nobody for me to hang out with nearby, and while I did have a few close friends who I would hang out with, for the most part I felt secluded and alone. Looking back, I feel that this really made a world of difference. 

I learned to make my own fun and be my own best friend. The woods where I grew up were filled with an abundance of imaginative opportunities. I walked amongst the trees with fairies and elves. I swam with mermaids. To this day, the worlds I created in my mind feel so real that I almost believe they really existed. 

I try to keep my imagination alive today. It’s so much harder once you become an adult. I still read all the time, but I feel like my own ideas have almost completely disappeared. That’s what I think creating this blog was about for me. I want to bring back that side of me. I loved myself so much back then, and it feels like for the better part of my adult life I have lived in a bubble of self-loathing. I miss being the eccentric girl who would hide in the woods to read because a sofa was just not a good enough spot for escapism. I miss writing stories almost every day, just because I had so many thoughts going through my head that if I didn’t get them out, I would explode. I truly think having an overactive imagination is one of the best personality traits a person can have.